Shawl

The silent shawl covers -
what happened
is between me and the mirror
who speaketh no lies
who speaketh no truth-
only staring at my
silvery phantasm
while I make up.

Videos

Smile,
castrate and smile,
whether you're looking at her or him...

Smile
castrate and smile,
give it a lighter touch to the faces...

Making videos,
silently,
making videos,
silently,
slipping a view in
to take whatever love there is.

Smile,
castrate and smile,
in the room reigns two smiles...

Smile 
castrate and smile,
there's a story to tell now...

Making videos,
silently,
making videos,
silently,
capturing the last
bit of love that lingers on...

alibi

in the last story
you worked your way
through my pen
and slowly carve
a crude presence
by tapping and
writhing until
you became aloud

Landscape

To survey each curve,
follow each bending
and inspect the crack,
tracing a portion on
a blank piece of paper,
I map my presence on 
your body with a
poisonous red mark that
will endure each season
of cold winter and
blossom one quick spring.

I cannot promise this
study of carnal imprints
will guarantee a return. 
Since I'm alone with the
capricious wind, and
passion might manifest 
somewhere else in time.
But I cannot yet lose
this moment to explore
the delicate tendrils
we build over our bodies.

Patterns 

I don't even know you
exist anymore
than yesterday that
was meant to
be forgotten

Your smell lingered
on my pants
reminding me how
poisonous you
came to be

When you speak as if
nothing happened
I want to curse
you forever
and evermore 

why you hide?

why you hide? like a secret
in the deeps of a cave
desiring creation
feeding poetry
resurrecting sleep

all you need is a...
handjob to release 

you only crawl by the night
sidling past like shadow
denying mirrors
brewing philosophy
escaping familiarity

what you want is a...
handjob to relive

why you hide? deeper inside
the cocoon of humanity
conjuring truths
recanting beauty
murdering society

partitioned

all sides slid into
many compartments comfortable
for a 500 words review

that makes life look
so thin when compared to
a night of love songs

wishing you could see
beyond closing brick walls
stifling restless arms

for each manacle to
break the illusory fulcrum
you must release me

take away the boards
erase within all partitions
while I lie waiting

I'm not your worship

i don't belong to this covenant, that which He place on you. and the manipulations strongly bound to the earth, to the people, of skins and colours. i do not want your hexagram and that birthmark that says, i'm god's people. because i'm not his child. therefore, i am who i am, i'm not your worship. i'm not part of your cult, i'm not into your golden age tomorrow because tomorrow never comes. sometimes i want to bash you up to make you see, yet violence is not the answer, in this case. sometimes i just want to make you listen... make you know that i do not belong to you... so leave me to my muse and let her attend my puzzles.

sometimes people think i am out of my mind, i've too many things and i'm weird. well, i like to play on that a lil' to be honest, yet simply i am who i am, i'm no different. i'm no different because i'm the same, i refuse to be a rebel like how most would glorify in legends, nor am i impress when i choose not to conform to the collective ideology. because i don't believe in being different, i can just be myself. i'm without the hunger to seek something beyond, yet just complacently living my own life. people have criticised me for my motto, 'i don't know and i don't care', yet they fail to see the elusive beyond and only what was meant partially to be humourous while also demonstrating a sense of lackadaisical.

it is common when one takes the sentence and read it literally. those whose literary understandings are not built upon the bones of dead poets and haunted vision clearly will not see through the riddle. yet ironically, there is really no big deal and ultimately it ends with nothing as it beings with nothing. someone once say that it is because of such attitude that i become someone who does not take into account the consequence of my action. it is true to an extent that i've been rather callous because i can operate at a very brute and boorish level. yet that is not all me for within lies compassion. my anger, my wrath wakes at the hour of the angels, it is like the fierce strength that will burn everything in its way.

and what about my attitude? how will you condemn it? because you're bathed and clothed in a tradition of details and specializations, you've forego the ability to understand ambiguity. this is not only implying that you've misunderstood my motto but also your ineptitude to poetically reconcile the paradox within life and death. no truths can be specifically and empirically categorised but they are wisdom to be tasted by the tongues that are touched by the holy fire from heaven. do you understand what am i saying?

so now you know a person who doesn't strive to be weird or anything but just doing his fancy, pursuing his interests and hoping that one day there will be a better life for us here on earth. i remain an armchair socialist, i won't write boring pretentious plays about politics, nor will i stand under the hot sun shouting my lungs out to free some old-goat sodomite. what i'll do is say a little prayer for you and if the devil's in my way, i'll burn his arse down.

that is me. i defy reason and logic, for i'm born at the mercy of the reaper on the last bargaining hour. i'm a child of the dark moon, there is nothing more sinister and calm than i am. i know who i am, and my course in life is clear. i've charted my path and i know what i want out of this life. 

maybe you do to, but you've been so cold. nothing seem to budge you, as much as i want my way out of this, you come into the picture. we're intricate kreatures, too closely breathed into one unit. where is the solitary standing ever going to come in? what is independence, and the value we call freedom? i don't have you, i'll die, yet with you around i suffocate. the only reason for us to exist together, to have to cling helplessly to each others merciful veins have no bearing to us wanting or not wanting. the fact is, i came into you, you became part of me. we share a blood, and it floods from eden, or somewhere. we learn each other somehow, somehow... yet do not rape me, do not make me you. for i'm myself and i keep a boundary, i demarcate my point, my qutub.

i'm who i am. i'm no difference. i'm compassionate, yet i'm angry. i love you more than anything else. what will you take from me, my good world?

written by simon soon © 2002

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